Sunday, January 24, 2010

Willpower

One of the worst things about this disease is that it undermines one's willpower. It makes it incredibly hard for me to focus and concentrate and plow through the work I have assigned myself, and when I fail to accomplish what I need or want to do, it's difficult not to berate myself...which of course only makes me feel worse. It's discouraging to recall how much I used to be able to accomplish in one day, and to be grateful that I can do what I am actually doing now. Sometimes I have to just force myself to carry on and push through, five minutes at a time. One minute at a time, if that's what it takes. When my mind wanders I have to pull it back like an unruly puppy.
I did, just now, complete the work I had lined up for this weekend and I'm really pleased. It means that this evening I can spend more time working on the jewelry that is bouncing around in my head. I was doing a little research earlier and was surprised to find that the images that are influencing it are actually more Tibetan than Byzantine. The research also reminded me that jewellers two thousand years ago already thought up most of the ideas I've had!

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